1) be realistic
2) plan ahead
3) outline your plan
4) talk about it
5) reward yourself
6) track your progress
7) stick to it and keep trying
8) don't be too critical if you fail
The reason there is so much failure with New Year's resolutions is that much of our behavior is empowered by our human nature and then enforced by our unconscious learning habits. Our behavior is controlled by three things:
One… our minds and the information that we receive. Hosea writes of God: "My people are destroyed by lack of knowledge…" Hosea 4:6
Two… our spirit, that which is a combination of our will and hearts .
Three… our fleshly wants and needs, by that I mean the basic urges and wants that so easily dominate the direction of our life.
To intentionally change our behavior, we must understand that something is wrong and harmful to us and those we love. We must understand that, not only is something harmful to us, but to other people and can be very displeasing to God.
Today, most people realize that smoking is a bad habit, they realize that it is harming their bodies. The information is getting out to people and for the most part they know they should quite. And that is the first step. But….Many people don't want to quit. In fact, if you ask them not to smoke around you, they can get rather defensive and angry. Then others really want to quit and they are embarrassed because they can't quit. They hide when they smoke and even seek help but they just have a difficult time laying down and throwing away the cigarettes. But, at least they have taken it to the second level. They really want to quit. They are willful and needful to quit, but just cannot. I've known people who have cried and grieved themselves because they cannot quit smoking. I've known people who want desperately want to quit drinking. Their lives are being destroyed and they still cannot say “NO”. Why? Because, like us, their flesh is weak!!!
The term flesh in the Bible is rather confusing. Because most people who read the term "sins of the flesh" don't understanding what it is saying. They believe it to mean something sexual in nature, like inappropriate sexual acts or desires that someone might have problems with. And certainly "sins of the flesh" could mean inappropriate sexual thoughts, adultery or fornication. But the broader definition of the term is a sin which is centered in selfishness. It means that the good and wholesome needs which we all have, have gotten terribly out of control and are destroying our lives and the lives of others around us. They are so out of control that those wants and needs are overpowering what we know to be right and good and even have taken away our freedom of choice. Even though we strongly want to do what is right, we cannot because the needs or desires of our flesh are so strong in pulling us in the wrong direction that we cannot do what we need to. We are so self-absorbed that we are enslaved to the desires of the flesh.
Believe me, the confessing alcohol or drug addict knows what he or she should do, but there are times they have such an overpowering desire to use their drug of choice that they cannot resist. It is like someone trying to live a sinless life without Jesus. Even with Jesus, try to live a perfect life and see how hard it is. Why? Because, even though the spirit wants to do what is right and feels the need to do so, the flesh is weak.
In the garden of Gethsemane when Jesus found Peter asleep He said to Peter: “Could you not keep watch for one hour? Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." Matthew 26:40-41 In other words, Peter: "I know you want to do what is right, but your flesh is just too weak. Peter, you should be praying that you will not fall into temptation." I believe that Peter's temptation was to do what we believe he did at Jesus' arrest - take a sword and try to defend Jesus and himself. He knew that wasn't what Jesus wanted, but the strong desire to take up arms and defend his Master overcame what he knew to be right.
In the Bible, any time the flesh is pulling us to do something sinful and wrong, it is considered weak—not strong. So Jesus says, "your spirit is willing, but your flesh is weak." So many times in life our spirit is willing but our flesh is just too weak to do what is right.
How do we get ourselves out of this sinful dilemma? We don't, because, for the most part, we are too weak. God has to do that and He chooses to let His Holy Spirit be the transforming agent in our lives. A recovering alcoholic in AA has to admit that he or she is helpless before the tyranny of alcohol. We have to admit that we too are helpless before the tyranny of sin. A recovering alcoholic has to reach out to the help of a "higher power" to find the salvation they need from the stupidity of alcohol. We have reach out to the Spirit of God to find the help we need from the stupidity of sin.
Paul says in Roman 8:6, "The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace."
But there is more, because the mind influenced by the Spirit is going to be the mind changed. We cannot have the Spirit of God and have the same attitudes of the world. We cannot have the Spirit of God and not be changed. The Spirit of God is the power of change in our lives. If there is a worthy New Year's resolution for you to keep this year, then it will take the power of the Spirit to overcome the weakness of the flesh. If not then you will fall short. Let me suggest a New Year's resolution for you...
One… It should be every Christian’s resolution and prayer that the Holy Spirit might make us and family in the person or persons that God wants us to be. That He might transform our lives. In Philippians 2:5 Paul writes: "Let this mind be in you the same as that of Christ Jesus."
Two… Resolve and pray that in this year the "Kingdom of God" might truly be realized in the community and in the world.
Three… Be it our resolve and our prayer that we might be an instrument of God's grace and peace.
Four… Be it resolved and our prayer that our church might be used for God's continuing glory.
Five… That He might truly teach us what it means to live the abundant life that Jesus promised us.
Six… That He might keep our friends and families safe in His loving arms.
Notice that resolutions turn very quickly into prayers. And there lies the key to the empowering the Holy Spirit… a broken heart reaching out to God's spirit in prayer.
Christmas Series: Celebrating Christ's Coming
Week of: December 3, 2006 Title: Did you know... ~ Christmas 2006 Part 1
Scripture: Luke 1:76-79
Did you know that our word Christmas came from the English observance of the birth of Christ called Christ’s mass?
Did you know that Christmas has not always been celebrated on December 25? It wasn’t until after 450 years after the birth of Christ that we started celebrating it on December 25. Until then different parts of the world celebrated it as many as 6 different dates.
Did you know that as late as 1658 Christmas was outlawed in England by the Puritans under Oliver Crowell who thought it was a “heathen celebration"?
Did you know that in Massachusetts Christmas was not a legal holiday until just before the civil war?
Did you know that the custom of sending Christmas cards began in 1843 when a Englishman by the name of Sir Henry Cole ran out of time to write personal letters to friends at Christmas? So, he got an artist to draw a picture of a group of merry wishers raising their glasses in a toast. Underneath it were the words, “A Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to You.” The card created quite a controversy because many people thought that it encouraged holiday drinking.
Did you know that the Poinsettia is a Christmas tradition that comes from Mexico? According to the legend, a boy name Pablo was going to his church to see its nativity scene. Realizing that he had no gift for the Christ child, he gathered up some branches and weeds from the roadside and laid them a before the manager. The other children laughed at Pablo, but as soon as they laughed there appeared on each branch the brilliant, star-shaped flower of the Poinsettia.
Did you know that candy canes were first developed by a candy maker in Indiana who designed the story of Christmas in each piece? The hardness of the candy represents the rock hardness of the Christian faith. The white represents the purity of the life of Jesus. The red stripes symbolize the bloody wounds caused by his flogging. The shape of the cane is a shepherd’s staff, reminding us that Jesus is the “Good Shepherd.” Turned upside down, it forms the letter “J” for Jesus.
And, do you know that the Advent Season, the four Sundays before Christmas, is a time to get ready for Christmas? The word advent is from the Latin adventus, which means coming. It has always been a part of Jewish-Christian faith for certain people or things to announce what God plans on doing. For example, the Prophet Isaiah himself announced the coming of a Savior: “For a child has been born for us, a son has been given.” Isaiah 9:6 He spoke of Jesus when he said: “Behold, a virgin will be with child and bear a son, and she will call His name Immanuel.” Isaiah 7:14
He also prophesized: "Here is my servant, whom I uphold, my chosen one in whom I delight; I will put my Spirit upon him and He will bring justice to the nations. He will not shout or cry out, or raise his voice in the streets. A bruised reed He will not break, and a smoldering wick He will not snuff out. In faithfulness He will bring forth justice; He will not falter or be discouraged till He establishes justice on the earth." Isaiah 42:3-4
Mary, the mother of Jesus, had the angel Gabriel appear to her telling her she had found favor with God, and that she would give birth to son, which she would name Jesus. When Jesus was about to be born a brilliant star led the three wisemen to Jesus.
Meaningful things in life usually don’t come without some preparation and warning. So much so, our scripture this morning has Zechariah prophesizing about his own son, John the Baptist, who himself was to prepare the way of the Lord. (see Luke 3) If great and wonderful things are going to happen in our lives, it is God who prepares the way for us. It is God who is going to make it possible and many times He does so after a great deal of time and preparation. If God is going to do good things in our lives we must let Him mold us and make us.
Many times we all hear it said: “Christmas is too commercialized. The Christmas season is too hectic. I am too busy to enjoy things that are truly in the spirit of Christmas. I wish Christmas would just hurry up and get over.”
Let me say to all of us, if Christmas is going to be meaningful this year, we must depend on the Spirit of God to let us find the true meaning of the season.
And once we seek God’s help in finding the true meaning of Christmas, then we must do everything we can make it better. For example, during advent make a special effort to:
Celebrate God’s gift of love in Jesus Christ. And avoid those things which take away that spirit of celebration.
Read and study your Bible, share your faith, increase the fervor and frequency of your prayer life.
Try to be more faithful in worship than you normally are. Attend Bibles studies, listen to religious Christmas music, find people in need invite them to church, do for them as you would your own family.
Lookout after others and be as unselfish as possible. If you’ve lost a loved one this year and this promises to be a painful and lonely holiday then find something to give yourself to.
Give what you give from a loving spirit and a caring heart and then see if you don’t have one of the best Christmas holidays that you’ve had.
If the Puritans in England thought that Christmas back then was a “heathen celebration,” wonder what they would think of it now? I really don’t think that, without preparing the way, we can wake up December 25 and expect to have a spiritual holiday. I think that if we want a spiritual Christmas that will be better than we’ve ever had before, we must start today and have one throughout Advent.
Christmas starts by preparing our hearts right now. Don’t wait until the 25th.
Week of: December 10, 2006
Title: Christmas Dawn ~ Christmas 2006 Part 2
Scripture: Luke 1:76-79
Darkness is often perceived as the absence of light. However, contrary to popular opinion, total darkness does not exist except maybe at absolute zero, a dark hole or the very heart of Satan. Scientists now believe that small amounts of light particles, in the form of radiation, permeate every corner of the universe, meaning then that darkness is just “less amounts of light.” (Wikipedia) So darkness like many things is a relative concept—more or less light.
Lygophilia is the love of the dark. It is the desire to be in dark or gloomy places. Of course, when most of us think of a person living in darkness, we think of a vampire. But actually, there are people who prefer to work, travel, and live in darker places. There are even folks who are allergic to sunlight. (Wikipedia)
But the Bible says that people also love another kind of darkness. Jesus said in the Gospel of John: “Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light…” John 3: 16-21
The darkness that Jesus and the Bible is referring to is a darkness that is characterized by a lack of relationship with God... a lack of relationship with God which causes people to live in various degrees of darkness. Just like scientists theorize there are various degrees of literal darkness in the universe, maybe there are various degrees of spiritual darkness or separation from God. Now don’t get me wrong, anyone who doesn’t know God as Savior and Lord is separated from God, but there does seem to be people who are farther away than others.
Ponder this for a moment, Jude writes in his tiny little letter: "(There are men who) are blemishes at your love feasts, eating with you without the slightest qualm—shepherds who feed only themselves. They are clouds without rain, blown along by the wind; autumn trees, without fruit and uprooted—twice dead. They are wild waves of the sea, foaming up their shame; wandering stars, for whom blackest darkness has been reserved forever." Jude 12-13
What does it mean to live in darkness? To me one of the deepest darkness of life, in this world, is despair.
How many of you know what it is to be depressed? Depression affects some 20 million Americans every year. Depression is disturbance of ones mood to the point where a person might have extreme sadness, painful thoughts, strong melancholiness, loss of appetite, anxious, and prolonged loss of energy, just to name a few. Depression in itself can lead to darkness of one’s heart and soul. Then there is a deeper form of depression that is despair.
Despair is when one feels like there is literally no hope. No hope for one’s situation. No hope for one’s life and no hope for the life to come.
Now many people become depressed and lose hope that they will get better and they accept it. Many people lose hope that their marriage will get better and they get a divorce. Many people lose hope and have to realize that they never will walk or do the things at one time they used to do, and they adjust.
But other people lose hope that life will get any better and they punish themselves and those around them by escaping to drugs or alcohol or tragically take their own life. And then many people lose hope in Heaven and God and live without any regard for God and for life everlasting. When someone has no regard for life nor for God they are existing in darkness. A disregard for life and God generally leads to a morally bankrupt existence.
Paul writes in Romans, “let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light. Let us behave decently, as in the daytime not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy. Rather clothe yourself with the Lord Jesus Christ…” Romans 13:12 Finding ways to satisfy one’s selfish, sinful nature is living in darkness. And further, darkness compounds the power of our sinful nature, and worsens the degree of sinful thoughts and deeds. In fact, Isaiah says something very perceptive of our situation and culture: “woe to those who go to great depths to hide their plans from the Lord, who do their work in darkness and think, “Who see us? Who will know? You turn things upside down, as if the potter were thought to be like the clay. Shall what is formed say to him who formed it, “He did not make me?” Can the pot say of the potter, “He knows nothing.” Isaiah 29:16 The deeper one gets into moral bankruptcy and darkness the more tempting it becomes to tell God how it is. It is like the clay jar telling the hands whom formed it how the jar should be made and how it should be used.
In Matthew Jesus quotes Isaiah 9: 1-2 by saying that “the people in darkness have seen a great light, (that) on those living in the land of the shadow of death, a light has dawned.” Meaning that those who choose to live in darkness are living on the edge of death. Human beings are not nocturnal creatures.
Most of us need darkness to sleep but we all need light to live. Spiritually those who live in darkness are the walking dead. They are spiritual zombies who don’t know that the very best of themselves is dead or dying, but the ugliest and most selfish part of them is walking around and getting stronger. Spiritual darkness will cripple and eventually kill you.
Well, what does this sermon have to do with Christmas? If darkness is the sickness, then Jesus is the cure. Our scripture says that “the rising sun will come to us from heaven to shine on those living in darkness.” Jesus is the dawning sun that gives light to the whole world. Luke 1:77-79 According to John 1:9 Jesus is “the true light that gives light to every man.” Jesus himself says: “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” John 8:11-13
At times it is hard for us to imagine how one person could and does affect our world so much. And it might even be hard to imagine how one person could change our individual life so much. But, those of you who are parents, think with me how much that having children and grandchildren has changed you. People who were once childless have been forever changed by the birth of a child. If you think I am selfish and ignorant now you should have seen me before our children were born. Children often change everything about our lives (and most of the time it is for the better).
Take the children or grandchildren you have and multiple it a hundred fold and you might have some understanding or something of the significance that that baby wrapped in swaddling clothes has made to millions and millions of people. If the birth of a child can change so much in our lives as parents, can we truly measure what the birth of Jesus has meant to us?
Napoleon Bonaparte was in exile on the isle of St. Helena toward the end of his life. During that exile he was having a conversation with one of his exiled generals. It is reported he said this:
I know men, and I tell you that Jesus Christ is not a mere man. Everything in Christ astonishes me. His spirit overawes me and his will confounds me. He is truly a being by himself. One can absolutely find nowhere but in him alone the imitation or the example of his life. I search in vain in history to find (someone) similar to Jesus Christ, or anything with can approach the gospel. Neither history, nor humanity, nor the ages, nor nature offer me anything with which I am able to compare it or explain it. Here everything is extraordinary.
Christmas is about celebrating the birth of a child that changed everything. Someone so unique and so wonderful that his life and death changed the world immeasurably and brought our lives out of darkness into the light.
His light has given us eternal life and for that alone we are eternally thankful.
Note: No sermon for the week of December 17, 2006 ~ special program
Week of: December 24, 2006
Title: Christmas Peace ~ Christmas 2006 Part 3
Scripture: Luke 1:76-79
Have you heard this prayer?
Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace; where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; and where there is sadness, joy. O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood, as to understand; to be loved, as to love; for it is in giving that we receive, it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.
Amen. (Francis of Assisi)
It only mentions the word peace once, but the whole prayer has a spirit of peace about it. Peace is one of the hardest sought after, most elusive, and needful things in the world and in our lives. I’d like to talk to you this morning about three levels of peace.
Everyday Peace of Mind
Much of what disturbs and worries us are things that we cannot control and things that we cannot make up our minds about. It is ironical that despite all the modern conveniences of life we have and the more we try to get control of our lives, the more out of control our lives seem to be. Many of us feel that we cannot say “no” to demands on our time by our children, our schools, and even our churches. Christmas season has been miserable for many people because we don’t know how to prioritize our lives and say “no” to the rest. For many people the biggest question of the Christmas season is “have you got all of your Christmas shopping done yet?” So the peace of mind, at least on this level, comes from making choices—but not just choices but the right choices. Let me give you a list of 10 choices you need make daily that will help you have an ordinary peace of mind.
(1) Whenever possible (and sometimes it is not possible) keep your nose out of other people’s business.
(2) Do your best to forget and forgive.
(3) Don’t crave for recognition. Remember that recognition, for the most part, is here today and gone tomorrow. If you base your peace of mind on recognition, realize that the same people who are bragging on you today will be criticizing you and bragging on someone else tomorrow.
(4) Don’t be jealous. Jealously will consistently destroy what little peace of mind we have. (5) Don’t bite off more than you can chew. Have you ever got into so much that you cannot sleep at night?
(6) Adapt and change according to God’s will as you grow older. Be open minded, yet be grounded in the truth of the Bible.
(7) Endure the things you cannot change. Many things in life are out of our control. We must simply, by the grace of God, accept them and endure them.
(8) Pray unceasingly. Saturate your life with prayer.
(9) Don’t procrastinate doing what you need to do, and don’t second guess anything but your own goodness.
(10) Occupy your mind and heart with good and Godly interests. Spend more time understanding yourself and worshiping God, than escaping reality by watching TV.
Inner Peace
There is a deeper peace, a more lasting peace that comes from making more important choices. Decisions that effect who you really are, what you want of life, what it is that you really value, and what direction your life is going. These are the biggies. They certainly affect our ordinary and everyday matters of peace of mind, but they are much deeper. So deep that some people are not really aware of the decisions they are making until someone or something points it out to them. Sometime ago there was a young man in our community whose life was heading in the wrong direction. I told him, “Look man if you don’t quit looking for short-cuts to get what you want in life then you're going to be in deep trouble.” Sure enough, within a short period of time, he was in jail and is now a convicted felon. I don’t believe he deliberately chose to go to jail, but I believe he didn't care enough not to risk it, either.
You don’t have to be a criminal to have made really wrong decisions. For example, how could anyone who has seen the truth of Jesus Christ, not want their life affected and changed by His Love. That’s the reason those of us who are Christians can’t understand how anyone could or would reject Him. We’ve seen the truth and the truth has set us free. The decision to accept Him has not by any means made our lives perfect, but it has given us a different way of viewing ourselves and our world that can help us have peace of mind.
Someone might be thinking, "Preacher, the Christians I know are not exactly pictures of serenity." But to the person that says that, I want to say: “Yes that is true, but you wouldn’t want to see us without Jesus.” If there is ultimately anything good and peaceful about me it is because of Jesus.
In our scripture this morning, Zachariah says that John the Baptist will be called “a prophet of the Most High” (Luke 1:76) who will prepare the way for Him who will “guide our feet into the path of peace.” (Luke 1:79) He will prepare the way of Him that will be able to direct us to find the personal and interpersonal peace we need in our world and in our lives.
Having Jesus in our lives can give us the capacity to self-soothe. Psycholgists might suggest that people in personal turmoil have lost the ability to soothe their troubled lives. If there is any soothing in my life, in any means available, it is because Jesus has made it possible. Through family, friends, or personal revelation, salvation, or even through medicine, God’s grace is preparing a way for peace. Jesus gives us the capacity to soothe our trouble lives.
Christmas Peace
The peace of Jesus is the ability to turn anxiety, fear, and hatred into love. Changing these destructive emotions into love is what Christmas has brought us. When love replaces anxiety and hatred there will be a proportional peace. John came preparing the way for Jesus, and Jesus came to give us love, which by the grace of God will eventually give us the deep peace that the Bible speaks of.
In fact, the apostle Paul says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:5-7
Horatio Spafford was a Chicago businessman in the mid-eighteen hundreds. He sent his wife and his three daughters to Europe by ship. Enroute, there was a terrible storm and consequent shipwreck. His daughters were lost in the storm. Mrs. Spafford made it to safety and wired back to her husband, “All of our daughters have been lost. Only I have been saved.” Horatio took the next vessel, and as they came near the place where he was told he daughters drown, he wrote: “When peace like a river attendeth my way, When sorrows like sea billows roll; Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say, “It is well, it is well with my soul.” I don’t understand this depth of peace, nor do I want to understand it in that kind of context, but I do believe in the peace of God, that what God wants us to experience is a peace beyond all understanding... something that comes our way because we know that we will never be alone.
Jesus is our peace.